Heartbreaking Video On Gay Marriage Goes Viral

As North Carolina becomes the 30th state to entrench gay marriage discrimination in its constitution, a video is going viral about the very serious consequences of marriage inequality. Shane Bitney’s boyfriend, Tom Bridegroom, died when he fell from a rooftop accidentally. Shane soon learnt what not having marriage equality can mean. The video has gone viral and reminds us all of the impact equality laws have on our personal lives. Learn more here.

email

Published on May 09, 2012

Written by Newzar Breaking Video News Team. Posted in Hot List, Politics, Trending, US NEWS

Tagged: , , , , ,

122 Comments

There are currently 122 Comments on Heartbreaking Video On Gay Marriage Goes Viral. Perhaps you would like to add one of your own?

  1. Lets forget for a few minutes everything. Lets forget about the legalization of gay marriage. Lets forget if its a choice or not. Lets forget the bullshit religious morals. We are all equal. We are all human. We all feel. We all hate. We all love. We all bleed. We all live, and we all die. THIS is what happens when you’re discriminated against. This is what pure hate brings.

    This isn’t about gays being able to marry, even if it would’ve made things easier for him. Its about the fact that the one mans parents completely disowned him and put him down so much that he felt there was nothing more to live for. Had his parent shown the least bit of support maybe things wouldn’t have turned out that way. Whether this videos true or not, this happens every day. Whether you’re gay or not, people are constantly being bullied to the point of suicide and its pathetic.

    Reading the comments on this page has me so disgusted with some people. People angry because hes using his lovers death to legalize gay marriage. Who cares? His story is touching and hits the point clearly. Maybe he actually can make a difference. maybe he can save others lives. If gay marriage was legal maybe more people would be accepting in the long run. Maybe he sees it as a way of continuing their life, continuing one of his dreams, of keeping his love alive in some way.

    The religious fanatics are the worst. I know plenty of Christians who think homosexuality is a sin and you’ll go to hell, but also know that it is up to GOD and GOD only to judge them. They know that ANY hate regardless is still hate and is still against gods will. I find it completely contradicting to hate on someones lifestyle in the name of god. Doesn’t that mean you’re holding yourself over god. You think you’re that much better as if you could speak for him? I don’t believe in the exact christian god, but i can guarantee he wouldn’t approve of mindless hate towards others because something they do make you uncomfortable.
    Sometimes i’m just sickened at how some people think. How some people can justify the filth that spews from their mouths as if they’re some miracle that going to lift a plague from this world. Worry about your own life. Saying homosexuality is wrong is just stupid. Yes a gay couple cant get each other pregnant, but were already over populated so whats a few less kids? And what about all of the children in adoption centers? A gay couple can raise a child fine I’ve seen it happen on numerous occasions. Homosexuality has been around for a LONG time.

    Its ok if you think its gross or it makes you uncomfortable, but to spew hatred and act as though they’re pushing their lifestyle on you when you’re the one pushing your lifestyle on them is ignorant. Its stupidity at its finest.

  2. I’m so sorry, as a Catholic, I can safely say that priests and the pope and all those people are completely missing the point of what Jesus said, I’ll definitely keep you in my prayers so you can recover from this, I’m 14, so I may not necessarily have that much of a voice in the world yet but I promise when I do I’ll try to make life better not only for you but for other same-sex couples whose marriages and love is considered irrelevant. Just remember that you’re just as much of a human being as everyone else and you deserve to be able to love whoever you want. People don’t understand how normal gays are, you have such a normal family, your nieces are adorable and you never did anything seedy, and since you’re so normal you deserve normal rights.

    Sorry if that was really long, homophobia just makes me sick.

  3. Sad story. My GF and I are not married and we prob never will marry.

    If we can put aside the this mans loss for a minute and remember that we should all have wills. Married, single, gay or straight. DO NOT have a business or property with anyone without having a will.

    This is a sad story and great that it can be used for your cause. A will would not have helped with the parents hate but would have made his life easier after his loss. And I believe HIPPA laws would keep even a spouse out of my medical records. I had to sign HIPPA consent forms for my GF.

  4. Shane,

    I’m so sorry that you’ve had to experience loosing the one you love. I’ve lost my own son in 2001 and feel part of your pain. As a mother I find it heartbreaking that Tom’s family couldn’t accept and love him for himself instead of what they thought he should have been. Parents should raise their children the best way possible ( remember no parent is perfect ) and should love their child/children for WHO they are not for what they want them to be . I have not experienced having one of my children come to me and tell me they are gay, but I believe with all my heart if any of them had or would that I would still love them because they are a part of me and because my love has no boundary’s. I’m sorry you’ve had so much to deal with both emotionally, legally, and more because society doesn’t accept that love is love and it doesn’t care if your male or female , it’s souls that become one and they are inside the outer shell of whoever one falls in love with. What is saddest of all is that everyone has lost now. You’ve lost your soul mate – the love of your life Tom, Tom’s parents have lost their son and all the future he had to share with them, All of your friends and extended family have lost a loving member, and Tom lost his life because he couldn’t make his parents happy, society happy and because of that he wasn’t able to be happy with life. My heart wraps hugs around both you and Tom and prayers will be said to help you through this painful time. You’ve been respectful in telling your’s and Tom’s story and it is Tom’s family and society who should be hanging their heads and asking for forgiveness for not accepting others for who they are. (((((( Shane and Tom )))))) keep talking and sharing.

  5. I’m deeply sorry for your loss Shane. I don’t family and neither does my girl friend. I’m unsure if either of us will ever be an open couple to our family. Thankfully where I live gay marriage is legal, but it’s heartbreaking to know there are still so many terribly ignorant and hateful people in this world.

    A realy family are people who love you unconditionally and are loyal. The blood that runs through are veins do not ultimately determine who your family is. Blood related or non blood related people choose who they love as a family.

    I find it ironic when people say, “I don’t want gays messing with marriage” pardon me but many heterosexual couples have destroyed the meaning of marriage. Money, power and status is why some of these people get married. So if a gay couple wants to get married, because they truely love each other, I don’t think anyone has the right to judge that. Nobody has the right to tell anyone who should be married to who.

    Shane I hope you will keep fighting. We need more strong people like you in this world. The world needs to know this behavior is morally wrong.

    xoxo

  6. I am so devastated by this video. I am the mother of a transgender girl. She is 16 All I want is for her to be happy, She had a hard time dealing with her feelings and went on rages for about 3 years. The church and members told her she would go to hell for being gay. I beg to differ, god made her that way and me as her mother always knew in my heart that she was either lesbian or bi. I know that god did not put my child on this earth to damn her to hell. She finally excepted herself at age 14 and came out to my whole family a year ago. She is happy, no more rages, my entire family excepts her and loves her for who she is. I pray that she never has to go through what Shane went through. I find this video very inspiring and I will share.

  7. …yah its sad…but you’ll never convince people…Gay is gay in so many religions in so many aspects…and it will never be truly accepted….I personally…i don’t care…but i will raise my children into the beliefs that i believe are right…homosexuality is a choice…your not just born that way…and honestly all the stress from discrimination should have made you two realize that….love doesnt come once in a life time…its chosen…and whether you choose to love or not to love..im moved but not conceeded….i believe that marriage consumates love between a man and a woman ….and thats what it should be held to…its been that way for 2000 years of human existance and beyond…being different doesnt make you wrong….but it does make you different …and not all revolutions are meant for justice….a crusade for gay rights is dumb….you can have your freedom…but the freedom to raise kids in an enviorment thats not surrounded by homosexuality is t what i want for my future or anyone elses…

  8. Shane, I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t even imagine what it would feel like to lose someone that you love so dearly. watching the videos of you two together, I can only hope that I can have what you did.

    As for the comments on this, half of them absolutely disgust me. I am young, but old enough to understand that nobody should be treated differently based on race or sexual orientation. My parents brought me up to be an accepting young lady, and I truly believe that the ignorant, close-minded people of this country are the downfall of society. Since the beginning of our country there has been a desperation between church and state. And even if you don’t believe yourself that gay people should have the right to marry, answer one question for me: how does a couple living a happy life together with all the rights that you have affect your life in any way? Who are you to tell people what they can and cannot do?

    Here’s to the future and the accepting generation that will live in it. Judging other people is a way of the past. I am a straight female that believes that ANYONE should be able to get married. We will win this fight, because we’re passionate about what we believe in. Start minding your own business and stop deciding other people’s lives for them.

  9. Dear Shane, I just want to express my condolences to you for the loss of the one person you chose to commit to and love. It’s so terribly sad that you have no say in how his life was remembered or in getting more information about his death. It breaks my heart that his family was so incredibly cruel to him when he told them about you and then to you after his death. Such closed minds will never win IMO! Love is love and who you choose is up to you; up to each individual. I’m a woman married to a wonderful man – no difficulties, just paid for a marriage license and was able to celebrate the day with both our families. We been married for nearly 44 years and have both family and friends who are gay.There is absolutely NO difference between their love, their relationships, their marriages from mine. THERE. IS. NO. DIFFERENCE. Please find a way to spread your story and find a way to go on. Whether you find another person to love is up to the plan God has for you. I hope and pray you do and this time, I know you’ll both take all the precautions to have the right to make decisions during your lives and after. Loving someone is a special gift and you and Tom were given that gift when you both met and fell in love. He truly is with you in spirit and in love. I’m so glad you were able to visit his burial spot, even though I know it was truly the most painful visit you’ve ever made. May God bless you and keep you. Carol

  10. Hurt and touching. Tom’s family lost their son long before they lost him for life. I’m angry regarding there attitude and I’m pitty them. I have no words to comfort but maybe America will change the laws of marrige to gays and this would be a small comfort for you. I wish many will have the love that you had. God bless you

    Amir
    T.A

    Israel

  11. first i want to say sorry for your loss,shane.i didnt listen to the video and im sure what you have heard from his family and from others wasnt the right thing to say or do,but i also want to say that God loves YOUand your partner and any other gays that are out there.i dont support gay partner’s because of what i believe in GOD’S WORD.we are suppose to love everyone and i love everyone,gays, murders, thiefts,drunkards,the list can go on and on.and i know that us Christians dont show the love but judge the gays and i’ve learned not to do that because i once was one of those thiefts,and did drugs and slept with a every guy and i even killed my baby.i had a still born birth,she had spinabifa.and she is in heaven with Jesus.but i turn away from my sins and ask God to forgive me for them and ask him to come live with in me.and my sins were forgiven,because Jesus died for me and for the whole world.i was set free from sin,and i try to live a sinless life but i fall a lot but i get right back up with God’s help.and i know alot of people will say a bunch of stuff about this and that is ok.we have free will to do what ever we choose to do with,but what path will you take because there will be a day when you died and you will have to answer for everything that you have done with your life,mostly bad (sin).me too.well my prayer is to you that God will speak to your heart and show you his LOVE for you.

  12. Shane,
    Your story is truly sad, but Marriage is not the only answer to the problem you had so sadly experienced. You could have legally prepared your property, business or any other value that you and Tom shared without Marriage. Marriage is just an agenda for Gays and Lesbians whether most believe it or not. This should be a lesson for all Gays and Lesbians until Marriage or another form of marriage is devised for the Gay and Lesbian community. I personally believe we will never resolve this marriage issue, so until then…Lesson learned all the G&L couples out there, seek a lawyer and legally protect all that is important and precious to you before hand.
    I think irregardless of this marriage issue, we can still live with the respect and dignity for all those without hate and homophobic slurs. And for the G&L community, just because we do not agree to your lifestyle or path the G&L community is taking it, we are not haters or homophobe’s just because we refuse to support your way of lifestyle.

  13. I just want to make things clear, all of the disbelievers that have commented on this have One solid answer why two men or women can not be together. You throw bible verse around more then any other religious believers do. Us as Americans, are changing, and my generation is taking it in full force. Being under the age of 25 most of you are going to say that I am to young to understand. When I have most likely seen more hurt in pain not only in my personal life but around the world.

    All of you disbelievers are sending the statement that you do not believe that true love exists. Just because it does not follow what you “think” you believe in, you do not accept it. The bible says we should wear cotton mixed clothes or eat pork. But im guessing if you using the word “folks” you most likely own a pig of your own and are preparing to eat it at one point.

    Shane comes from a small town, where normally people would not accept him for who he is. Being that i live in Indiana, I can believe Tom would have had a rough time too. The hero’s in this story are Shane and his family. Shane for stepping up and fighting for what should have been legal all along. Shane’s family for being the bigger people and being supportive for who their son is. Taking their son being gay most likely was not easy, but the important thing is they accepted it.

    Now, honestly, I am a firm believer in true love. It shouldn’t matter if it is between a girl and boy, a boy and boy or girl and girl. Why? because i believe this country needs a change, a reality check. We are not in the 50′s, we are not the smartest county and this country is highly hated because of our government. We are not the perfect country because of all the close minded people who only wanna follow the bible when things threaten your “normal” world. WAKE UP. Gay marriage will be legalized. maybe not this year, but my generation, we are coming and we feel strongly about changing this country. Gay marriage is the start of things.

    p.s Shane what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Keep doing what your doing. Make sure other people in this same situation don’t end up erased out of the person life, because of idiots who don’t accept change.

    #EqualLoveEqualRights

  14. In today’s society where there is so much hatred, gun violence, killing of innocent people I fail to understand how anyone can cast stones at two people who genuinely love each other and are busy minding their own business and building a life together. Tom’s parents threw Shane out of the scene because they were embarrassed and unwilling to accept the truth about their son. But I have to say they obviously had blinders on. The clues are always there, family just chooses to overlook those clues sometimes. As straight as I am, I am in complete support of equal rights for those who choose alternate life styles. Can we please worry about gaining control of the guns and leave innocent people alone!? Seems a much better way for people to spend their energy then hating gays.

  15. Well…I watched this video and I did feel a part on my heart ache and go out for the loved one’s involved. What saddens me the most about all this is the rude remarks or the ” Christian ” remarks peple are making about all of this. Being ” Gay ” is not a sin by any means. It is not something that can be ” Medically Treated “. You love who you love, Simple. Same sex marriages have the same issues, happiness just like everyone else. If ANY of my kids told me they where Lesbian or gay I would be a proud parent that my child knew in there heart and mind that they could even tell me and I wouldnt love them anyless. We bring children into this world to find love and to be loved with happiness. They think bullying is only in school’s..it’s everywhere. Open your eye’s and your hearts and don’t just judge because of what society tells you or a book with a cross tells you to believe. God says he loves all his children. I rather believe that than a book that a bunch of men wrote together in what they remember and some how it changes every century. Note: I am not bashing the bible I’m a catholic. But religion shouldn’t matter in this discussion. Shane darling, just think of Tom and all the happy times you had together and know he IS in heaven and one day you two will meet again.

  16. Such a sad video! The bible says if a man and another man lie together they should be killed it also says if your children disobey you they should be stoned to death… Why do people still discriminate against gays yet nobody stones there children for disobeying them? Its pathetic and infruiating as a gay man myself I have been so lucky that my whole family embraced me coming out but this reminds me it could have easily went the other way. Your whole life your worried that people will treat you differently and then when you finally pluck up the courage to tell your family if you were treat with such ignorance as this guys parents who knows what you would do? Think about this the next time you curse someone who you feel doesnt conform to your ”normailty” infront of your kids, imposing your ignorance on to them. I know if I had a child I would love them no matter what and all I would wantr for them is happiness and I would want them to be able to tell me anything without feeling scared…. Watch this movie… Prayers for bobby its a very similar story to this. Dont judge something you dont understand. You never hear of gay people hating on straight people do you? Straight people make gay people so why hate us? Think about it

  17. Shane:

    I married my guy almost a year ago… and we feel so very fortunate to be living in a city/country where our right to love whoever, is protected from the haters.

    My husband and I don’t have a lot yet, but we have each other. Our marriage is based upon love, a committment to look out for each other, and a desire to build a long life together. We have our differences of course, but we have a common respect for the institution of marriage.

    I often look at my friends that live in the USA and wonder, how can a country that has gotten so many things right about preserving freedom around the world… be so wrong about these same issues which protect its’ own people!

    Your youth go into combat in foreign lands to protect democracy and rights for freedom for people they do not know. Yet if they happen to be gay, they are denied the basic freedom to choose to marry their lover, when they return home.

    I do hope that some day soon, America wakes up and realizes the contradictions that have been in place in your society for far too long. Engaging in wars to fight for freedom in Afghanistan should not trump the freedoms of your own people.

    Shane, it is unlikely you will escape the pain of this loss, but I hope you can find comfort in knowing that you – and Tom – can make a difference in the lives of your fellow Americans. This will be his legacy.

    Remember with fondness his smiles and self-demeaning humour. The echoes of his laughter will carry through eternity.

    With pride,

    Michael
    Toronto, Canada

  18. Pretty sad story. I agree with the will and legal comments…but if marriage was legal for these two they would have been married when this occurred and had the important rights. I don’t think we should expect gay couples to have to fill distinct legal documents in order to give them similar rights to marriage….it’s two consenting adults. Why do you really care? I don’t get it. That part about the funeral is tragic…imagine if your wife or husbands parents were either out the picture or terrible people and if something happened they’d be the ones to have authority to decide on the funeral and body. Gay people living together for ten years or being married for ten years doesn’t affect society…it only affects the two of them. Ridiculous and sad – in 20 years well look back in shame on this sick control we want to have on others.

  19. I am so, so sorry for your loss. It disgusts me to hear how Tom’s family acted especially regarding your rights to say your goodbyes at his funeral and burial. That was NOT fair what they did! Who plans violence on a family member’s funeral?! That just is not right at all. Do not feel like anything was your fault though. You did nothing wrong. You felt because they were his parents that, given the circumstances, they deserved to have their say as well and that when they said they would keep you informed, you believed them. I would have done the same in all honesty. I can sit here and say “No, I would have told the woman to go fly a kite, etc.” Really though, my heart would have sank for his parents so I would have reacted the same way you did. For them to take advantage of your sympathies just goes to show how heartless people are these days! It makes me sick how that family acted. They should be ashamed of themselves but even if they aren’t, trust me- karma will make them understand what they did was HORRIBLY wrong! The thing is….you spent most of your lives together. You loved each other, you saw the world together….you two did so much together so YOU have the amazing memories with him not his family! His family have the memories of when he was a child and the ignorant bs they caused over their own son’s death and funeral! Always remember the good moments and yes, keep your message going for everyone in the world to hear so people in a similar situation to you and Tom will know they are NOT alone. The best thing you can do is speak up now, continue to do what you are doing- spread your story and spread your proof that gay couples can live amazingly happy lives if ONLY there was equality allowed. As much as it may hurt now, keep talking because you are a caring and kind person and you don’t want anyone else to hurt like you have so make sure your voice is heard by as many as possible. You will still have haters, there are always haters as they are like pests and insects- stuck in their own little worlds with their tiny brains not understanding the reality of life itself! Just remember though, life has always been about change! Over the years millions of things have changed. Things that we do now would have been complete “no-no’s” years and years ago so I believe that equality for gay couples will come. I believe it will. I am heterosexual but I strongly believe that we have the right to love who we love regardless of body parts! I fight daily against people who insist on getting into the faces and personal lives of gay people and bully them, try to change them and tell them they are wrong when they aren’t. You are NOT wrong and you NEVER were!! My husband was raised strict Christian but over the years has understood the difference between life and the Bible. He still is very religious but he very much believes that gay relationships and gay marriage is allowed. He accepts and supports it. If one person can change then others can as well. It will take time for the stubborn ones, the ones who are clearly set on their own beliefs. We don’t need to change everyone’s feelings about equality for gay couples/people, we just need the right ones to understand that EVERYONE has the RIGHT to CHOOSE where their own life goes! You are an amazing guy for making this video to show the world your story, you are very attractive and you seem very intelligent and kind so you will go far in this world with your life and your word. Always remember that there are tons of people who will have your back when you need it the most. Again though, I am very sorry for your loss. :( I’d hug ya’ if I lived closer. You’d think me some crazy girl but I’d do it anyways! LOL Best wishes to you and your future. Try to stay positive, if not for your own sake then for Tom’s. You knew him best and I have a feeling he would want you to fight the good fight for equal rights.

  20. This is so sad. My heart is breaking for this young man’s pain he is going through. I am a Christian and I am not concerned as to whether he is gay or straight. What matters is that he is in tremendous pain because of his loss. he is a human the same as you or I and needs to feel compassion and love for what he is going through. I would give him a hug just to help him bear this tremendous pain. And to let him know that not all Christians are full of bigotry and hate. Some of us know the true love of God. God bless you son.

  21. Being religious is a state of mind and thought, what you believe in is up to you and only you. If you decide to “follow” what you’re told to believe is true and right yet it doesn’t feel right, then obviously it’s not right. No church, religion or person has the right to tell another person who they can and can love. If a man wants to love another man, who cares, what does it hurt you? If a woman loves a woman, what does it hurt? No one cares when a man loves a woman… Really what is the difference and who does it hurt. NO ONE!! We’re all the same on the inside, made of the same bones, blood, organs, etc… our hearts tell us who we’re going to love, and for someone to step in and say you can’t love that person, is just ignorant.
    And that’s exactly all this is, the ignorance of people thinking they have power and control and abuse it.
    This is one of the worst stories I have heard in a very long time, if not ever. How could someone not be allowed at the funeral of their loved one because of the ignorance of the people around them, who weren’t even around them when they should have been. Instead of pushing away her son and his boyfriend, that Mother should have been a real Mother and stood up to that jackass of a husband of her’s and said, THIS IS OUR SON AND WE WILL LOVE HIM AND ACCEPT HIM NO MATTER WHAT!!! They should have been the ones turned away at the funeral, erased from his life…. But, no. They had the control, power and ignorance and abused it.
    I feel so bad, really feel for anyone who is forced into situations like this. LOVE WHO YOU WANT AND TO HELL WITH THE IGNORANT!!!
    If we all listened to what others told us to do… we’d have a seriously messed up world. This has got to stop, the gay bashing, hating, retaliation… give it a rest, let our hearts choose who we love, not the churches and people around us.

  22. I don’t even know where to begin…
    It physically disgusts me that his parents would do that to you, to their own son.
    I have never seen an issue with it, not just because I live in Canada.
    Sure I’m a Catholic, born and raised but my family still doesn’t care who I marry, as long as they love me.

    And that’s the way it should be, because love itself is a hard thing to come by as it is, true, honest, and absolute love. That’s what I saw watching the video, 2 people who have made a life together and shared everything.

    My best friend just recently came out to me (but I’ve known for a while) and told me she was gay, my response?
    I just looked at her and said “So…?”
    I told her I would love her no matter what she was and that would never change.
    She’s seeing someone right now but due to her overly homophobic mother she’s keeping a secret until she moves out, then she and her girlfriend can start their own lives.

    And that kills me, that she has to hide who she is, who makes her happy.
    That if someday if she finds the love of her life, she won’t be able to get married happily like everybody else, with her parents standing looking on happily, surrounded by the people that love her.
    Everyone deserves to get married and express their love, whether it’s in a church or at city hall for all they care.

    I know this must seem like such a regurgitated answer but that’s because it’s the most basic and simple way to look at it, do I have much exposure to gay couples?
    No, not really. Besides my best friend and some distant cousins, I’ve been relatively sheltered from this issue.
    So when I look at it and say I don’t see the issue, I honestly do not see how those who have a child or friend that gay can look at them and say that it’s a sin or an illness.
    To me, people like that are the only real sickness, and the way I see it, all the people who kill themselves because they’re gay and ashamed are directly those people’s fault.

    With all the issues that happen in the world today, I can’t believe people are still so wrapped up in same sex marriage.
    Though then again it took the same bunch of assholes to get over interracial couples.
    But I still believe in equal rights and I will never stop fighting for it.

    So to end off this lengthy comment I will leave you all with a few words that a great actor so eloquently put,

    “I hate the word Homophobia.
    It’s not a phobia. You are not scared.
    You are an asshole”
    ~ [Morgan Freeman]

Leave a Comment